I am currently indulging in strawberries and cheese. It’s getting close to actual filling food again!!!!!!!!!!!!
Been feeling even more left out of life lately.
Spent my day half like this:
I love me some Sylvia Plath.
and I miss swinging. It was one of the best feelings I have ever experienced.
Images from WeHeartIt.
I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. I’m trying to gain some energy to hopefully have something interesting to contribute to the world next week
I have determined this stuff is as good as coffee.
That is a big statement for me to say.
Mind = moderately blown (likely as a result of being overly tired and then overly caffeinated).
Lately, I’ve been having some anxiety in regards to leaving the house.
I mean, this is to be expected…especially after being prone to puking and hating being stuck at places that are not my home while quite ill.
I was convinced to go out to a benefit tonight. All I heard about it was that it was an all woman thing put on by someone to raise money after a suicide, and that there was free wine. I should have put two and two together. Alas, I’m a bit on the slow side and the temptation for free wine was too strong.
So I get there and it is massive. There are hundreds of women milling about, some of which are social workers and nurses that I have met in the hospital before. It is a fundraiser for the Canadian Mental Health Association.
The speaker was a very inspiring girl named Laura and she was a schizophrenic. As she documented her loneliness, inability to trust her own brain, and experiences with medication and madness…I couldn’t help but have flashbacks of my own. And they hurt. A LOT.
It doesn’t help with the recent giving up of treatment by one of my doctors in favor of the belief of a somatization disorder. Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. I have so many diagnoses under my belt I have no idea what is the truth anymore. More referrals in the future, just like the last 11 years.
All I know is that I’m in pain and feel like staying in more often.
Also, my eyesight is incredibly blurry tonight.
It sucks to be a female and have some sort of pain-receptor connection be slightly off in your brain. As it hurts. A lot. Hormonal migraines and stomach and leg aches galore. I think I may not move ever again.
Top 10 Things To Do When Hormonal
- Read things like Gives Me Hope and cry/smile about the fact that there are still a few good people left in this sometimes horrifying seeming world.
- Online shop for shoes. This is a given.
- Avoid other people as much as possible so as to not be snappy at them.
- Watch Gilmore Girls and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Over and over and over.
- Look at Cute Overload and wish I had 18 pets.
- Search the Internet for funny and/or pretty pictures. Like this one.
That poor freaking bird. I can hear the de-ne-ne-ne-ne-ne-na music in the background of my head. This might be because I’m crazy. It’s possible.
7. Consume useless celebrity gossip. I don’t know why, but when you are sick a copy of US Weekly is like gold.
8. Read Ruminations
. Laugh because I think the same things on a daily basis.
9. Drink tea. Secretly wish it was coffee. Drink more tea.
Anyone have any other good ideas for that rather grumpy time of the month?
“It’s all make believe, isn’t it?”
~ Marilyn Monroe
(Click photo for source).
Alright people I need suggestions!! I am looking for cheer-me-up movies, tv shows, music, podcasts, anything.
Please give advice…I need smiles.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
It’s a bizarre thing to have another job let go due to a health situation.
I had been off for too many days. I could come back if I thought the illness was going to clean up quickly and tell them it would not happen on a regular basis. I would also have to fill out their papers and have doctor’s notes done up by the end of the next day. I couldn’t promise that and I have a hard time lying when it still could be weeks until I get a half-recovery. On top of that, I’m so broken that it hurts to move half an inch, let alone go somewhere to fill in health papers. I should work on my perpetual guilt complex.
I’m probably too blah to fully deal with it yet, but I’m sure the emotions will be a-coming. I got a referral for a new doctor but it will be 3 full months before I see him. It’s hard to have no answers for that long.
Who am I kidding??? This is my 11th year of this bullshit.
I’m starting to come off as bitter. I’m going to brainstorm later possible jobs I might be able to manage (like writing! but no one ever pays me for that! woooo).
Until then I’m going to go suck on more Gatorade. I develop such a hatred for Gatorade when it’s all I get to have in the run of a month.
Lots of love (I will be positive again soon!),
I’m pretty sure I am less spry than the average 90 year old right now, with this virus munching my muscles.
Someday I will be healthy again. More like healthy-ish. Sadly, I lost yet another job. I am failure city.
But still. I miss shopping. And doing anything but laying in bed.
Found a sweet blog though!
I don’t know why but I pretty much live for self-help blogs. Fashion blogs too, but that is just because I like beautiful things. On the plus side, my hands still work so I’m going to do more cross-stitching and typing.
I love the blogosphere!!!